Bullying is a way some individuals use to prove their strengths and capabilities right in front of the feeble or young ones. As part of growing most of us have once or multiple times experienced this awful act while in school and sometimes in society. It’s part of growing up thought but, in a fact, no one ever deserves it. Most people especially children have go through hell dealing with bullies. Some go to the extent of taking their own lives and causing serious harm to themselves all in the quest to stop the bully on them. Sometimes, it doesn’t take words or personal decisions to make it stop, actions and reports mostly work.
An example is the story of Rebecca Sedgwick, in Florida who had no option but to commit suicide because she experienced a hell of a bully at the hands of two young girls. That was what Rebecca thought was right and the only solution to end her problem. Also, in Nigeria, a story emerged as a Nigerian student, Sylvester Oromoni, a 12-year-old being bullied and beaten by fellow students which eventually led to his sudden death. There are several such bully cases all over the world.
Table of Contents
Sum. Stats About Bully In Most Schools All Over The World
Reasons Why Bullies Bully Their Colleagues
- Sexuality
- Difference in religion
- Gender differences
- Ethnic differences
- Physical structure/appearance
- Envy
- Hearsay etc.
According to school authorities, the following places are hotspots of this violence or bully.
+ means maximum
– means minimum
+- mean averagely
- Classroom (+)
- School bus (+)
- School compound (+-)
- Canteen (+-)
- Bathroom (-)
- School gathering (-)
- After school (-)
Definition Of Bully
Noun: A bully is an individual who is physically, emotionally or psychologically cruel to other people most especially to the weaker individuals.
Verb: This means to intimidate or act aggressively to make someone feel uncomfortable or threatened.
Bullying In Schools
Whether you are a teacher, a student or a parent, we can all play a role to put an end to this youth violence. Most people in their middle age, old age and even young people have gone through the treachery of bully whilst in school. Others chose to speak up but authorities never gave them the needed attention and help. Whilst others made a decision to go through hell on earth dealing with bullying. Some also went to the extent of taking their own lives.
In this article, we would take a trip to check out the various types of bully (in summary) and how teachers, parents and students can help put a minimize or if possible, put a stop to it.
Types Of Bullying In School/Community
1. Physical Bullying
Most students in our schools suffer from this type of bullying almost every day. Which only a few of them reports. Physical bullying involves having one-on-one contact with the victim by using sharp or any destructive object to cause harm to the fellow. This can happen in so many ways. For example, when victims are hit, punched, bruised or items(stones, metals, etc) at them. This causes physical injury to the victim.
2. Cyber Bullying
In this case, victims are harassed and attacked online. This could be done publicly or privately. This is meant to put a sort of pressure on the victim. This type of bullying has the potential to cause depression, emotional stress and can be very harmful than physical bullying.
3. Direct & Indirect Bullying
Direct bullying is directly having contact with the bullied victim. An example is yelling or shouting at someone with offensive words to make them feel uncomfortable and down. Also, indirect bullying is a situation whereby rumour about someone is being spread whether true or not. Indirect bullying isn’t having a direct bully on the victim.
4. Emotional Bullying
This involves the use of words or actions to cause emotional pain, stress or hurt to another person. This can result in depression, anxiety and pain inwardly.
5. Sexual Bullying
Sexual bullying in its sense is done in a way to speak ill of someone else’s sexuality or gender. This is done by using words and actions to make offensive comments and unnecessary touches, molest or romance.
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Effects Of Bullying On Children
Most children who express bully in schools go through a lot of emotional, mental/psychological, and physical effects in school and outside the sphere.
Effects Of Bullying On Children
•Health Complications: Most children who are victims of bullying in schools face lots of health problems especially when it’s related to sexual bullying or physical bullying. Victims develop wounds, bruises or skin/damages on their bodies.
•Depression & Stress: After bully, children tend to have some flashbacks of the event. This is likely to result in a sudden hike in sadness, loneliness, stress etc. Also, this could affect their mode of life in general.
•Academic Performance Drops: Abused or bullied children are most likely to miss class, drop out of school and have truancy during school hours.
•Possible In Change Of Behaviors: Most children change after a bully incident. This mostly happens when the victims develop the idea of wanting to revenge. This doesn’t mostly happen. 10 out of 100 students will choose vengeance for the trauma.
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What Children Should Do/Not Do When Bullied At School
What Not To Do
The best way to react to school bullying is not to act back or retaliate. As earlier stated, bullying mostly affects young people who are less older than the bully. So in this case, choosing revenge will only cause more harm than good.
Also, most children unwillingly tend to choose to keep mute or never talk about it because of;
- fear of rejection by peers,
- fear of humiliation,
- backlashing,
- possible disgrace from peers,
- adults and teachers or even fear that he or she might be bullied extra if it’s broadcasted.
- Fear grips most kids in an attempt to complain or report to authorities. Therefore, REPORTING the abuse or bullying would greatly have an impact on your quest to eradicate bullying in our schools.
What To Do
Students who are victims of bully should REPORT the bully to school authorities and if possible, any other private or governmental organizations who are into helping children overcome that. When this issue is sent to the appropriate desk at school, the authorities would fight their way in and help victims overcome fear and live a happier life after.
What Parents Of Bullied Victims Should Do
The only solution most parents have is, getting their wards admitted to another school to escape the bully. But is that the surest way? Ugh, no! One thing for sure is, bullying is everywhere. Most of us have fallen victims before. If the appropriate action is not taken, your child would face bullying everywhere he or she goes. Parents should always do a follow-up whenever their children report any form of abuse(bully) to them. There should be nothing like minor abuse or bully. A few drops of water make a mighty ocean right? Therefore, instead of thinking of enrolling them in another school with the thought of escaping the bully, follow-up and deal with the situation once and for all with the school authorities.
Some parents seem so busy to the extent that, making a follow-up feels like a burden and a waste of their time. Your child is worthy of all the wealth you’ve accumulated. Make each second of their a very precious one. Count their worries and headaches as your topmost priority. If they report an abuse, ask questions and know how, what and when it happened. No matter who was right, follow-up should be a must.
Parents should talk to their child’s school teacher and ask them to keep an extra eye on them. Parents should try to involve the school in case of any bully on their children.
As A Parent – Don’t
- Don’t spill hurtful words at your child for reporting.
- Don’t also blame them for being bullied. No one loves to be bullied.
- Don’t think that, bullying can train your child to be tough.
- Don’t pretend to have a deaf ear. Don’t sleep on the report, follow up!
- Don’t try to verbally solve the issue at hand without taking action towards it.
- Don’t take matters into your own hands. Submit complaints to the school authorities.
Signs Of Bullying
- Change in habits(eating, peer association, cooperation etc?
- Having nightmares, difficulty in napping.
- Anti-social or social isolation.
- Loss of interest in lots of things that previously excited them.
- Faking illness or frequent aches around his body.
- Having low self-esteem
- Intentionally harming themselves or loving to talk about hurtful experiences.
- Being depressed or stressed.
- Unusual or uncertain injuries around their bodies.
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Solutions To Bullying
How A Child Can Avoid Bullying
- Stay calm and not retaliate or react towards the bully.
- In a low tone, tell the bully to stop
- Walk away if the bullying persists. Don’t try to fight back.
- Report bullying to parents, teachers, religious leaders, child abuse organisations, community leaders etc. Don’t sleep on it, SPEAK UP!
- Children should desist from being at hotspots of bullying. They should try to be socially friendly.
- Involve your child in social activities such as football, tennis, volleyball, skateboarding, athletic competitions, rock paper scissors, quizzes etc.
How A Parent Can Help
- Teach your child manners on how to treat other people with kindness, empathy, respect regardless of race, ethnicity, colour nationality etc.
- Involve your kids in social activities and get them monitored. If they feel uncomfortable participating, don’t force them.
- Think about possible consequences before taking any step towards a bully or a bullied child.
- Teach your child(ren) about compassion
- Teach your children about love.
- Spend more time educating your child(ren) on topics that concern them. Educate them on bullying and help them understand how general the situation is.
- If your child is a bully, seek to help them from the school’s health facility or outside the school premises. Help them get a one-on-one talk with a doctor or a counsellor or any individual or organisation who’s into helping children with that kind of issue.
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What To Do If The Bully Persists
The best thing to do after all actions, steps, and attempts to stop it proves void is, involve the Commission Of Human Rights and Administrative Justice(CHRAJ) in Ghana for help or contact the Civil Rights Division of the U.S. Department of Education or U.S. Department of Justice. If that also seems to delay or fails to help you as quick as you expect them to, report the abuse to the POLICE, simple.
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