Every parent dreams of a better future for their child. In African societies, this desire is deeply rooted in our values and traditions. We want our children to succeed in life, make us proud, and contribute positively to their communities. But there’s an important question many parents face: how do we guide our children toward success without stifling their dreams?
In many households across Africa, parents often steer their children toward careers they believe are “safe” or “respectable.” Medicine, law, engineering, and banking often top the list of acceptable professions. These choices are made out of love and concern, with parents hoping to shield their children from struggles they themselves might have faced. But have we ever stopped to ask ourselves: what does success truly mean?
Does it mean earning a good income at the expense of your child’s happiness? Or does it mean seeing your child wake up every morning excited to do work they’re passionate about?
How To Teach Your Children About Love: Really Necessary?
This article is a written conversation about why it’s so important to let children pursue their dreams, especially in our African context. It’s about how we, as parents and guardians, can support their aspirations, while addressing the fears and concerns that come with raising a child in today’s world.
Why Do African Parents Control Career Choices?
Before we judge parents, let’s understand where they’re coming from.
“We Want Security for You”
Many African parents grew up in tough economic times. They’ve seen people struggle, so they push their kids into careers that guarantee financial stability. “Better a doctor with a steady salary than a musician who might starve!”
“What Will People Say?”
In our communities, respect matters. A child who becomes a doctor brings pride to the family. A child who chooses dance or photography? “Ah, have they gone mad?” Parents fear judgment from relatives and friends.
“I Didn’t Get My Chance, So You Must Live My Dream”
Some parents force careers on their children because they couldn’t pursue their own dreams. A mother who wanted to be a pilot but couldn’t might push her daughter into aviation—whether the girl wants it or not.
“These New Careers Are Not Real Jobs!”
Many parents don’t understand modern careers like content creation, e-sports, or digital marketing. “How can playing video games or posting on Instagram be a job?” they ask.
What Dreams Mean to Children
Think about your childhood for a moment. Remember the joy of imagining yourself as a pilot, an artist, or maybe even a footballer? Children’s dreams are their way of expressing who they are and what excites them. For them, dreaming isn’t just play—it’s the beginning of discovering their unique place in the world.
Dreams give children a sense of purpose. They fuel creativity and teach them to set goals. When a child says, “I want to be an inventor,” they’re already imagining a future where they can make things better. But when we dismiss their dreams or impose our own, we risk taking away that spark.
Read Also: VIDEO: 6 Things You Should Never Say To Your Child, No Matter What!
Breaking Down the Fear of Unconventional Careers
Many African parents worry about their children pursuing careers that aren’t traditionally seen as stable or lucrative. For example, a child who wants to become a fashion designer might be met with skepticism: “How will you make money? Who will respect you?”
But the truth is, the world has changed. Technology and globalization have opened up countless opportunities in fields that didn’t exist a few decades ago.
Let This Sink In
The 21st-century job market is no longer limited to doctors and lawyers. Careers in technology, the arts, and entrepreneurship are thriving. In fact, many of today’s highest-earning professionals are in fields like software development, digital marketing, and creative industries.
People who are passionate about their work often excel because they’re willing to put in the time and effort to master their craft. For example, if your child loves music and spends hours practicing, they’re more likely to succeed than if they’re forced into a profession they don’t care about.
How to Support Your Child’s Dreams (Without Panicking)
1. Start with Listening—Really Listening
The first and most crucial step is often the hardest: stop talking and start listening. When your child says, “I want to be a musician” or “I love coding more than medicine,” your instinct might be to interrupt with warnings or dismissals. But before you react, take a deep breath and ask open-ended questions:
- – “What do you love most about this path?”
- – “Who inspires you in this field?”
- – “How do you see yourself making a living from it?”
This doesn’t mean you’re agreeing yet—you’re gathering information. Many parents panic because they assume unconventional careers mean instability. But when you listen, you might discover your child has researched their passion more deeply than you realized. That teenager who wants to be a gamer might already know about e-sports scholarships or content creation revenue streams.
2. Research Together—Become a Student Again
Fear often stems from ignorance. If your child mentions a career path you don’t understand, make it a project to learn together. If they say, “I want to be a social media influencer,” instead of scoffing, sit down and Google:
- – “How do influencers make money in Nigeria/Kenya/Ghana?”
- – “What are the risks and rewards?”
- – “Who are the most successful African influencers?”
You might be surprised. Many young Africans are earning life-changing incomes through digital content, tech startups, or creative arts—fields that didn’t exist as “real jobs” a generation ago. When you research together, you shift from being an opponent to a partner.
3. Find Mentors—Let Them See Real-Life Examples
One major parental fear is: “Will my child survive in this field?” The best way to ease this fear is to connect your child with someone already succeeding in that industry.
- – If they want to be a chef, introduce them to a restaurant owner.
- – If they’re into tech, find a software engineer or startup founder to chat with them.
- – If they dream of sports, arrange a meeting with a coach or retired athlete.
Hearing firsthand experiences—both the struggles and triumphs—helps your child make informed decisions. It also reassures you that their dream has a realistic foundation.
Read Also: How To Overcome Loneliness & Socialize
4. Create a “Dream Plan”—Balance Passion with Practicality
Supporting a dream doesn’t mean writing a blank check. Work with your child to create a step-by-step plan that addresses your concerns while respecting their aspirations. For example:
- – If your child wants to study art: “You can pursue a degree in Fine Art, but we’ll also enroll you in business classes so you learn how to monetize your skills.”
- – If they’re passionate about football: “You can train seriously, but we’ll also focus on your education. Many athletes retire young—let’s prepare for life after sports.”
- – If they’re into music: “We’ll support your music career for two years. If you’re not earning enough by then, we’ll discuss a backup plan together.”
This approach gives structure to their dreams while providing safety nets. It shows you’re not just saying “no”—you’re saying “let’s do this wisely.”
5. Encourage Side Hustles—Test the Waters Safely
Many parents worry their child will abandon a stable career path for a passion that might not work out. A smart compromise? Let them explore their interests while continuing their education or main job.
- – A pre-med student who loves writing can start a blog.
- – An engineering student passionate about fashion can sell designs on Instagram.
- – A law student interested in baking can supply cakes for events on weekends.
This way, they test their passion’s viability without burning bridges. If it succeeds, great! If not, they haven’t lost everything.
6. Dreams Need Funding
One valid concern parents have is financial stability. Address this by teaching your child how to monetize their passion. For example:
- – “You want to be a photographer? Let’s research how much wedding photographers charge per event.”
- – “You love gaming? Did you know top streamers earn from ads and sponsorships?”
- – “You want to start a business? Let’s draft a budget and savings plan.”
When children understand the financial realities early, they’re more likely to pursue their dreams responsibly.
7. Be Their Safety Net, Not Their Cage
Ultimately, your role isn’t to control your child’s future—it’s to prepare them for it. That means:
- – Giving them skills (education, critical thinking, resilience).
- – Offering guidance (sharing your wisdom without enforcing your will).
- – Being their soft landing (so if they fail, they know home is still a safe space).
The Greatest Gift You Can Give
Trust me, supporting your child’s dreams doesn’t mean abandoning caution—it means replacing fear with strategy. When you listen, research, mentor, and plan together, you don’t just say “follow your heart.” You say “let’s build a future where your heart and your livelihood can thrive.”
And that’s how we raise not just successful children, but fulfilled ones.
