Love is supposed to breed happiness, security and be the best place we can ever be. If you’re in a relationship and not sure how it is going, you probably shouldn’t be in it. The surety of a relationship is reason enough to stay in. If you do have not a single reason to be in a relationship, there isn’t any point in being there. Love should give you a purpose of happiness, memories, safety, and make you a better person. If you’re getting otherwise, you need to read through these valuable pieces for a healthy relationship life.
Don’t Be Too Hard
A person who truly loves you will surely do all it takes to make it much easier for you than you ever imagined. How stressful is your relationship? How hard is it? Are you trying so harder to make it work? What are your plans or thoughts to beat the challenge? All these are relevant questions that can help you get over a stressful relationship. Most people are in a toxic relationship without even knowing. A relationship that lacks happiness, relaxation, peace of mind etc is termed as toxic.
To get the best out of whom you love or throughout your relationship journey, don’t be too hard to squeeze out ‘love’ from that person. If they truly love you as they claim, it will manifest and you shall see it with your own eyes and feel it with your heart. Until then, don’t be too hard on either yourself or your partner. Love within your means.
Read Also: How To Teach Your Children About Love: Really Necessary?
Don’t Force It
Forcing a relationship to work is one of the symptoms of a dying relationship. True love should not be forced but be allowed to nurture naturally with no stress or pressure. If you’re going through tough times with someone you’re in a relationship with, it’s time to rethink and make up a decision to either find ways to better it, maintain it or leave for good. Toxicity is the worst thing you can ever dwell with. Sometimes it might feel that; your effort is worth the wait. But most times, it doesn’t. You’re just wasting your time.
If someone is really into you, they won’t make you beg for their attention, time, support, love and cooperation. All these are enjoyed by lovers who’re truly in love. At first, leaving the person you love because he or she is not showing any sign of interest might be the heaviest load to unload but trust me, it will be worth it for some time to come.
If he or she wants to end the relationship for reasons best known to him/her, don’t drag it. You can seek a chance to be a better person. If he or she says no, no means no, understand that and respect his or her decision. If you force him or her to stay or forgive you for something you don’t even recollect, what’s coming would be worst than what’d happened. In conclusion, don’t force relationships to work.
Don’t Beg For Anything (attention, time, love, respect, cooperation etc)
Never beg for anything! Take this from me. Love should be given wholeheartedly. If you have to struggle to earn someone’s love, attention, sex, respect, cooperation etc, you don’t deserve that person or you’re being considered ‘for the meantime’. Anyone who truly wants to have something with you will surely make it easy for your heart to freely penetrate theirs. If he or she has to stretch you from length to breadth just to see how serious you’re, then they don’t deserve you. If you feel stretched, move on. Love is earned not bought. A man or woman who’s interested to have you will always make it easy to get him or her. Testing your patience, faithfulness and trustworthiness isn’t reason enough to make you wait/beg for his or her love. That kind of love is not worth it.
Read Also: 15 Signs Of True Love
Respect Yourself
At the first glance, respect yourself. Don’t allow yourself to be ruled over(whether a man or woman). You’re entitled to personal freedom until you’re officially married. Don’t be a doormat for someone to step on without a bit of respect or sense to feel how it feels to be in your position. Give yourself the utmost respect and allow it to reflect in all your doings. If your partner doesn’t respect you, that’s probably the worst relationship you can ever rely on.
Give him or her a reason to love and respect you. To do this, it all has to roots up in how you love and respect yourself. In summary, don’t give yourself to someone who doesn’t know your value and worth. No matter how much you love him/her, never put your happiness, peace of mind and respect on the line. You’ll regret this for a lifetime.
Give Them 100% Of Trust Until They Decide To Lose It
When in love, it is absolutely wrong to think that; all men are untrustworthy. This would be the biggest unthoughtful insight from your mind. If you do this, you can never make room for ‘trust’ for others no matter how trustworthy they are. What I advise clients are; to love wholeheartedly, don’t have even a byte of mistrust in your heart, forget about the past, you’re in the present. Love and love with all you have. Trust someone with all your heart until they decide to lose it. Trust is a key element in love. There is no love without trust. Therefore, to have a better relationship life, trust your partner with all your heart. This is one of the valuable pieces for a healthy relationship life.
Read Also: Reasons Why You Always Have A Failed Relationship
What’s Theirs Is Theirs And What’s Yours Is Yours
Living with someone on a relationship basis doesn’t guarantee your freedom of accession to what they won. What is theirs is never yours and what’s yours is never theirs. Understand this and know peace. If your boyfriend has a car, a house, a phone or anything, he is entitled to them; it’s his vice versa. Don’t claim ownership just because he or she is your partner. Even married couples have limits to what they can freely have access to.
If your girlfriend stops you from using her phone, computer or anything or even replying to her messages, don’t take it personally. Understand that, it’s personal property and not for everyone to use unless you’ve been allowed to and vice versa. Even though y’all are linked and bonded but you must both understand the rule of individualism. Use what’s yours, unless you’ve been ticketed to cross your boundary.
Be Just, Transparent And Reliable
Be truthful, transparent and reliable at all times. If anything happens and it tends out that, it could ruin or jeopardize your relationship, don’t try to hide behind a lie to save your relationship. It could give it a temporal stand but eventually, the truth can hurt it so badly. You might end up losing that person, your trust and everything. The truth might hurt for a while but will shockingly create a bond you’ve never seen. Always be transparent with your partner. Tell it as it is.
If they suspect you of cheating, tell him or her the truth (what happened) maybe he or she might have gotten it all wrong. Making him or she understand the factuality of the situation will help to resolve it much better masking it with a lie. A relationship that’s based on lies dies young.
Read Also: 10 Best Relationship Advice For Men
Don’t Get Upset
Don’t be too emotional. Know when and how to address issues. Keep the lid down if you feel opening it up will be violent. If you’re angry or emotional about something that had happened, know how to address it. Don’t walk on your emotions’ path or desire. Be brave and strong enough to have absolute patience. Don’t take things too personally. If anything happens, find out from your partner first before taking any further action. Know how to control yourself at all times.
If They Want To Leave, Let Them leave(ref. no. 3)
What if my partner wakes up all of a sudden and wants to quit the relationship? And what if I have no idea what I did or what transpired her decision? Again, what if I tried asking but didn’t get any reason? Must I still keep my hopes up, beg and plead for him or her to forgive and get back to me? Frankly, no. You’re with than thrash. You need to be appreciated and loved by a person who claims to love you without any limit. Love knows no boundaries. Nothing should otherwise stop someone from loving you for a mere mistake or problem. Even if you’re forgiven, he or she will repeat the same thing; that’s how weak you probably are. Don’t ever beg someone to be in your life. Just like they decided to stay, they did with joy, if they decide to leave with no qualified reason, don’t be weak or emotional to let them stay. You might regret it later. If they’re meant to be yours, they will.
Therefore, if you realise you’re to blame or at fault, don’t be pompous, bossy or arrogant enough to apologize. Say sorry when you’re wrong. Seeking forgiveness is not a sign of weakness. Saying sorry also doesn’t mean you’re wrong, it only means you’re just looking out for a chance to perfect a mistake. Don’t lose someone you love because of little and forgivable mistakes.
Read Also: Differences Between Dating & Relationship
If You Feel Unsafe, Unhappy, Tensed, Pressured, Undervalued And Alone, Take A Break Or Better, Try Another.
How does feel to be undervalued by someone you love? How possibly does someone who claims to love you make you feel alone, unsafe, tensed, pressured and unhappy? Don’t love at all costs; love when yours is compatible with someone. Don’t be broken by someone who doesn’t value you. Give yourself a special place on this earth to be appreciated, loved, valued and treasured. You don’t have to be in a relationship where you’re treated as trash and unappreciated.
A relationship is supposed to be the safest place to be. Therefore if you feel unsafe or insecure with whom you’re in a relationship, you need to rethink it all over and pick up a better solution. If there is something you can do to shape it for the best, please do, if there is nothing you can do, take a break or better still, try another. Don’t let your emotions control your conscience. Sometimes leaving might be really hard but that would be the best thing to do too. Take the risk, feel the pain, think about it, but eventually, it all was off and you’ll get your life back together.
